Reflections on the healing journey
Forgiveness. Forgiveness cannot be rushed. “I forgive you” is a process, not a sentence. Forgiveness burns in our chest, sweats tears of anguish, wriggles and squirms, silently screams in fear, rages against the injustice of it all, and brings inner peace. Forgiveness is not easy. It cannot be required or …
I wonder what eternity means to you? There are many different ideas about it: the promise of eternal life, the comfort of loved ones living forever, the fear of eternal damnation, the possibility of reincarnation, a boring event that lasts an eternity, or a longing for there to be no …
I have been pondering, what is the spiritual abuse of children? And what are its effects? And what is a healthy spirituality characterised by? Let’s start with what some churches give as the definition in their own safeguarding policies. “Spiritual abuse is a form of emotional and psychological abuse. It …
Authenticity was not important in my religious upbringing. Fitting in was. We were accepted only if we agreed with and lived by the values we were taught. These included If a child grows up in a family and community where they are threatened with rejection by their family and that …
Sexual trauma is common. The effects can be catastrophic and long lasting. Yet, there remains a taboo around speaking about it. When it is talked about, the effects are often not understood, or are minimised. There have been conversations going on recently about famous people who sexually abused and assaulted …
Naming what has happened to you is an important part of recovery from any traumatic event. Some people recovering from harm caused by purity culture, may not know the names for and definitions of some of the horrible things they have experienced. So, I would like to start with some …
Purity culture in Evangelical churches in the USA has been talked about a lot on social media recently, with the release of the documentary Shiny Happy People on Prime. While this is an extreme example, purity culture also exists in some UK churches. Here are my reflections on my experience …
Silence There is within me a part called Mr Silence. Ironically, he is loud and commanding. Perhaps you have one too? These are some of the things he might say. “Children should be seen and not heard. Don’t speak unless you are spoken to. You must be silent.” “Women should …
I made a mistake. Inner critic is going to town on me. “How could you slip up like that? You need to take a long, hard look at yourself! You call yourself a good Christian woman, and then go and do that! You’re a hypocrite. Everyone will think you are …
Sacrifice is often perceived as noble. Today I ask the question is that always the case, or can it be an unhealthy, harmful practice? When I was a teenager, I was an avid reader of missionary biographies. One of the biographies I read several times was that of Keith Green: …
