These posts take common teaching found in Evangelical churches, and especially more conservative ones, which have been harmful to some, and do some deconstruction work.
In this quote, Anne Lamott invites us to sit with our questions and the mess. We do not need to deny our doubts or fear curiosity. We can deconstruct what was given to us, and go on the lifelong journey of deconstruction and transformation. A lot of this can happen …
Why have we in the church made some people outcasts? In recent weeks, I have had conversations with friends pondering why we have felt the need, certainly in conservative Christianity, to outcast LGBTQ people and to make women inferior? We have been asking the question, was this what we signed …
Are emotions such as happiness important? What happens when emotions are suppressed? How is “God’s glory” sometimes used to control and abuse other people? I read the following meme on Facebook, and want to highlight how this can be used to spiritually abuse others, as was my experience as a …
I wonder what eternity means to you? There are many different ideas about it: the promise of eternal life, the comfort of loved ones living forever, the fear of eternal damnation, the possibility of reincarnation, a boring event that lasts an eternity, or a longing for there to be no …
I have been pondering, what is the spiritual abuse of children? And what are its effects? And what is a healthy spirituality characterised by? Let’s start with what some churches give as the definition in their own safeguarding policies. “Spiritual abuse is a form of emotional and psychological abuse. It …
Authenticity was not important in my religious upbringing. Fitting in was. We were accepted only if we agreed with and lived by the values we were taught. These included If a child grows up in a family and community where they are threatened with rejection by their family and that …
Naming what has happened to you is an important part of recovery from any traumatic event. Some people recovering from harm caused by purity culture, may not know the names for and definitions of some of the horrible things they have experienced. So, I would like to start with some …
Purity culture in Evangelical churches in the USA has been talked about a lot on social media recently, with the release of the documentary Shiny Happy People on Prime. While this is an extreme example, purity culture also exists in some UK churches. Here are my reflections on my experience …
Silence There is within me a part called Mr Silence. Ironically, he is loud and commanding. Perhaps you have one too? These are some of the things he might say. “Children should be seen and not heard. Don’t speak unless you are spoken to. You must be silent.” “Women should …
I made a mistake. Inner critic is going to town on me. “How could you slip up like that? You need to take a long, hard look at yourself! You call yourself a good Christian woman, and then go and do that! You’re a hypocrite. Everyone will think you are …
